IPL Whirlpool

IPL Whirlpool

IPL Whirlpool

Busy days, I was telling one of my friends, with ‘this that’, and more of ‘that this’ to do. Then he asked if I was watching the fourth edition of IPL cricket. Ha, no, I said. Caught (Why does that happen, and always?).  So, rephrasing the ‘no’ part, had to admit that I did watch some of the matches.

If not, things I’d have missed:

– an ecstatic Andrew Symonds celebrating the fall of a wicket, with (oh, the surprise), Harbhajan Singh.

– string of idioms from the mouth of Sidhu. Now, they are famously called ‘sidduism’ and for your daily dose of those gems you can subscribe to them on your mobile phones, everyday. (my, my, the times we are living in).

– vibrant colours strung together, dubbed designer wears. (The winner is undoubtedly one of the teams from the South- orange and purple, anybody?).

– a jumping Preity Zinta, gorgeous Sidhartha Mallya, ever smiling Nita Ambani and a much subdued ShahRukh Khan, in live action (reaffirmation that all of us are mortals).

– the excited commentator saying, ‘what a shot’ for a prospective six, only to end with ‘.. but bad timing’ after the catch.

– anticipation of an outburst from the most ‘shanth’ member of the IPL teams – yet, to open account.

– the anchor gesturing furiously to the camera man to a. change angle b. go on a break c. show the face of the man talking, not the one listening.

– advertisements with taglines like ‘ brrrr’, ‘three idiots’ (er, three ideas), ‘oo la la le’ (not half bad as the first one), and unforgivably unfunny jokes from R. Kapoor Jr.

– praying for a duck for Sachin. Hmm, that’s mean.

Enough, as you suggest, since you can very well add your ‘gyaan’ to the above ‘wisdom’. Yet, have to mention:  I’d have loved seeing some of the Pakistani players in IPL – Akhtar’s bouncer for Umar Gul or Afridi biting the ball to help Zaheer Khan – not to be. Seriously, if Akram can coach one of the teams, why can’t the cricketers from his country play? Security? With defense allocation of $36 billion? Come on.

Anyway, for some of you who have managed to escape the IPL, I’d say, well-done. But, did you manage to escape from, ‘Prof. Dean’, and the rest of the ubiquitous in-house experts? If yes, you should check them out. How else would you know that it’s difficult to predict a winner in this format? Or, that 20-20 is here to stay? Or, to know, first six overs are crucial, the next fourteen overs are equally crucial?

Meanwhile, the long ‘to-do’ list, which, inexplicably, only seems to grow longer after every match, waits alongside.

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Merlin Flower is an independent writer and artist.

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